The other day we were sitting outside enjoying the sunshine during our lunch break. We were listening to a particularly elderly gnome go on and on about some gnome government overthrow… at least we were trying to listen. Gnomes can be incredibly boring and to be honest we were just hoping to enjoy some peace and quiet.
Just as the gnome was getting up to go back to the mystical forest behind Perpetual Kid®, this mime comes out of nowhere and kicks the gnome like you’d kick a football. Just for the heck of it. While the mime was doing that soundless laughing thing they do (it’s just creepy, right?) the gnome came back with a vengeance and bit the mime’s ankle. Well you can pretty much guess what happened next.
The fight was pretty bad and just as the evil mime (aren’t all mimes evil?) looked like he might have the last laugh, the angry gnome grabbed hold of his trusty ancient ram’s horn and blew a distress call. Before we even knew what was happening, a beautiful white unicorn came flying out of the forest and impaled the mime right through his chest. Don’t get all freaked out, there are only 2 things that can kill mimes - getting the mime to talk and olive oil. Don’t ask about the olive oil, just trust us.
We never did find out what happened to the mime because the unicorn, gnome and mime disappeared into the woods and we weren’t about to get in the middle of that. But we did enjoy reenacting the whole event for our co-workers using the Avenging Unicorn Play Set. The Avenging Unicorn Play Set comes with a hard vinyl unicorn and 3 soft vinyl figures just waiting to be impaled. Everyone needs an avenging unicorn in their life!
